taking back Responsibility

My parents were in town last week {bliss} we snuck away and rode the Heber Creeper. There is something terribly magical about a train ride.  I sat looking out the window feeling the fresh breeze and admiring the beautiful scenery...

I felt content (then my  little mister bit me ha.) 

Contentment. I can't stop thinking about how wonderful it felt to simply feel content.

 To sit there and for a brief moment let myself experience a feeling 

I am constantly chasing...I am in complete awe of it.

So when the  Husband arrived home from a business retreat..I was thrilled when he shared a concept that just might be the secret to finding contentment and becoming the very best versions of myself.

You can never be successful until you take 100% responsibility!

That completely knocked the chacos off my feet (completely in love with those sandals!)

That concept must be life changing, I swear it is the only thing that has been getting my not so tiny buns out of bed and on the treadmill in the morning! 

I am in pursuit of sweet, wonderful, blissful contentment :) And I am the only person who can find it for myself....If I could pay someone to be lose the extra pounds I'm carrying or to shed the guilt I shoulder.. or to have someone show me what a little more confidence would look like on me....

I already would have. Were talking in a heart beat!!! I wouldn't  have thought twice about it.

Honestly I never wanted to lose 40 pounds...I want to have already lost it. I want it to be just as simple to lose the next 34 pounds as it was to gain it....easy. 

But I can't. I am the author of my story and I am the only person  

responsible for getting in my own way. I have no other choice but to experience the journey of learning to love and trust myself.....that is a super frustrating thought...and terribly exciting

 To every person (myself included) who is afraid of failing, of owning up, who has felt  like the world owed them something and didn't deliver. Who feels overwhelmed, 

broken or confused. You still have a choice. Gratefully we are never really alone in the storms of life.

 We have all been blessed with the gift of agency. 

How different would our lives be if we all decided to use it? If we took responsibility. If we remember that we always have a choice.

*This post is a bit heavy....you know what they say you shouldn't drive or type while drowsy ;)

** I just reread my scattered thoughts and have decided that my new rule is that if I am up at 2 am it is better be with someone little who has the most delicious kissable  chubby cheeks....and not a key board...:)

note to self: go to bed. you neeeed your beauty rest. you are a mess today. and the only person you can blame is yourself....how is that for taking responsibility? 

Have a happy Thursday lovelies!